Sam Martinez, who has been taken prisoner by pirates and the extraterrestrial Syrinxi (giant birds with two-foot-long serrated beaks), escapes from his cell as the starship is travelling to the slave market, where he and the other people from Earth will be sold as slaves.
Sam begins to fight his way out of the cell with the help of Fergus, a Great Dane who is in the cell next to him. Sam intends to seize control of the ship with the aid of the craw Pesh, one of the Syrinxi’s lowest labourers outfitted with numerous tentacles and eyeballs.
A few other inmates are soon released by the authorities, including an actor who plays the role of Colonel Force, a space commander in a television show. There are many nods of this kind to favourite sci-fi stories, even including the phrase ‘to boldly go where none has gone before.’ Spotting the references is half the fun.
Of course, they succeed in taking control of the starship in a number of dramatic moments, rename it the Schwarzenegger, and decide to fight their way back to Earth (once having located it). Sam thus finds himself in command of an oddball group of travellers and aliens while he tries to stay away from the law and the star ship’s owners, a criminal organisation.
The characters are sympathetic, and the action is intense (even the Syrinxi captain). Alan, a medical student, and Cindy, a bright young woman, round out the cast. Both of them support Sam admirably and serve as the love interest, but romance plays a very minor role in the story.
Colonel Force, whose actual name is Jace Armstrong, thinks he is in charge, but Sam quickly puts a stop to his egotism and establishes his authority. Jace is chosen by him to represent the non-crew members, and from that point on, the Schwarzenegger sets sail for its intended destination while picking up stray animals.
Here There Be Monsters is not only entertaining, but it also upholds high moral standards: all members of the crew, even Pesh and Athe, are treated equally, Cindy is smarter and more pragmatic than the others, and no one is expelled from the airlock, even when they deserve it. If you enjoyed any of the books or films I’ve referred to you’ll enjoy this one, and I only hope it will make you laugh as much as I did.
About The Book
When Sam Martinez finds himself abducted by aliens, he thought he was having a bad day. When he finds himself in charge of an eccentric collection of fellow captives on a stolen spaceship, he realizes it could always get worse.
Thus begins the misadventures of Captain Martinez and the crew of the starship Schwarzenegger. Intent on finding their way back to Earth, they encounter strange new worlds, new life and new civilizations… and immediately piss them off.
Follow their journey as they navigate through bizarre alien customs, evade a crime syndicate with a score to settle, and match wits with a galactic government that refuses to recognize humanity as a sentient species.
The Review
Here There Be Monsters
Hilariously entertaining and every character is shining star! So much imagination and creativity that the story never has a lull, you won’t be able to put it down, I only wish it was a long running series and I’d never have to! This is science fiction tailored to my tastes. If you liked Star Trek, Star Wars, Deep Space Nine and Firefly, I think you will love this book! I know I'll be looking for the follow-up. Thank you, Mr. Buchanan!